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Where to start with home education?

2018-05-05 09:36:50

The "chicken baby" may be a lingering topic of conversation at the dinner table of your parents. "The Longox in your home is good, not only the ox, but also the chicken, more worry, the one in my home can be a frog is very good." This is a typical chicken-baby table slang. Among them, the Longniu refers to the natural cow baby, while the ox refers to the Olympic number cow baby, the chicken refers to their own chicken blood, diligence, and the frog refers to the ordinary baby. In view of the common phenomenon of the parents of chicken babies, we bring enlightenment to the parent-child relationship and family education for the majority of families.


Related content learned from experience


We live in an introverted society. Careers are involved, relationships are involved, and now education is involved. There is a passage in "Little Shide" explaining the words in the volume: "In a theater, everyone is watching the performance, suddenly an audience stood up, in order to watch the performance, the other audience had to stand up, and finally everyone from sitting to watching the play to standing." This is the theatre effect in psychology. The reason why the topic of "chicken baby" can affect everyone's nerves is because it is the product of internal volume, and it is the behavior of individuals to pursue individual interests without considering the interests of others, leading to the staged tragedy of the group. And the child is just a victim of this tragedy.


When a child is infected with parental anxiety, does it work? Actually, it does. Because research shows that anxiety and learning efficiency will show an inverted U-shaped curve, that is, appropriate anxiety, indeed help children learn better. But the question is, is the anxiety that parents are experiencing now "appropriate" or "moderate" anxiety? Not really. Previously, in the "Chinese Parents' Education Anxiety Index Survey Report", 68% of parents are highly anxious about their children's education. Then how can the child not be overly anxious at this time? So, we have to figure out the main problem: social anxiety leads to anxiety for parents, but also leads to anxiety for children, which leads to all kinds of problems. Therefore, if you want to solve this problem, you have to start from two aspects, one is how parents solve their anxiety, and the other is how parents do not let children worry too much. The former lies in emotional theory, the latter in how to carry out parent-child communication. So what can you do? Let's start with how to deal with your parents' emotional problems. Every parent is advised to learn how to engage in expressive writing. Expressive writing is a commonly used method in psychotherapy and has been shown to improve mental health, reduce negative emotional distress, depressive symptoms, post-traumatic stress symptoms, and increase subjective well-being. So this is a very appropriate way to reduce anxiety. You need to do this in the following way: a. Prepare a pen and a piece of paper, which will be the props you need to use for expressive writing; b. Next, recall or use the thing that caused your anxiety at the moment, write out all your emotions, feelings and opinions about it, do not need to worry about writing well, do not need to worry about spelling and so on whether it is wrong, you need to do just write out everything inside, and this will be kept private; c. Once you start, please write for at least 15 minutes, you may have more associations, it doesn't matter, just write down some of the ones that come to mind. In the future, when you have anxiety, you can take a pen and paper and write, so that your anxiety will be relieved. And how to carry on parent-child communication? It is recommended that when you communicate with your child, if there is emotion, then use time-out technology. time-out technology, also known as pause technology, when you are anxious, if you can "pause" for a moment, then the damage caused by your anxiety will be greatly reduced. Specifically, you can do this: a. When you are aware that you are in an anxious or impulsive mood, first stop yourself and do not speak; b. Next, turn your back on the child and take two steps forward; c. Then you can close your eyes, let yourself breathe deeply for about 30 seconds, and then face the child again. At this point, your communication will flow more smoothly.